i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
They invented the twister shot game. You put a shot on each circle, take it when you land on it, and if you fall, they funnel the mat and make you drink it. New best friends.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
My friend asked me if I got home okay and I replied "Glad teat. Goodnight." Usually I can translate drunk me, but I'm even lost on that one.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
Randomize
