You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
He got arrested in front of the church last night. Looks like we need to find a new location for the wedding.
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
I AM THE KING OF THE FRESHMEN
how did i know this would happen?
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
A guy with the name Pootie Tang winked st me and a guy that doesn't speak English messaged me. These are my choices?
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize
