Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Anyone who says sunshine brings happyness has never woken up with the worst hangover of their life to their window being open and it being a bright shinny day
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I LIKE NICE BOXERS OKAY!? COMBINED WITH A GLORIOUS DICK JUST MAKES THIS EVEN BETTER. WE MOVE IN TOGETHER AND THAT PIC'S GETTIN FUCKING FRAMED.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
I've peed outside too many times in just this past week
I was thinking we could get together and exchange gifts, and by gifts I mean orgasms.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
OMG I DIDNT READ THAT TEXT CAREFULLY CAUSE I'M ON THE DEVILS LETTUCE & I THREATENED TO PUNCH A CHILD OMG I'M SO SORRY
Randomize