all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Haha you were definitely messed up. Let me know if you need anything
Could really use a time machine and a higher self esteem, in that order
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
Best day ever, my junk is bigger than Kate Uptons boyfriends. Yay for Fappening day!
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Yeah well I fucked my ex on a sink last night soooo booty calls for us all
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