party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
I slept awesome next to you. You're like an electric blanket that I can have morning sex with.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
As a gift to myself for being so awesome at being single, I'm going to buy a vibrator
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
Randomize
