Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
my dad just paid them in porn...i no longer feel guilty for getting hammered and not helping
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
Randomize
