i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I was just standing there and then BOOM! She was attacking my face with her mouth.
I don't get it, man. She treated me like a sexual predator but treated you like a piece of meat.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I'm so hungover that if we go to panera, I'll probably get a bread bowl to throw up in.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
You said you're gonna end your night with a six pack and awful erotica
Randomize
