we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
We call her skankles because she's a skank and she has cankles, I thought that was obvious
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
It's your last night of vacation right? Be the Oprah of dick. And you get a dick... and you get a dick, and you get a dick!!!
Did I fall last night?
I wouldn't call it falling as much as you tried to lay on the sidewalk and proceeded to hit it face first.
You were drinking tequila through a straw.. and kept waving your arms at me and getting this intense stare down as you muttered something about jedi mind tricks.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
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