Does boxed wine and camel crushes signify a college date? Lets hope so
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
I was in the bathroom puking up mountains of tequila and when he came to help me, I held the door shut and kept yelling at him to let me be a lady.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
I'm sitting at work trying to dust glitter off my pants. I can't hang out with her anymore.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
he just kept repeating "those were some pretty nipple-y tits" over and over the rest of the night
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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