There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
How dare you send me a picture after midnight that isn't porn. You know the rules.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Two shots of gin says this is gonna be a sloppy lab write up.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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