To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
just saw an advertisement for the rock in the tooth fairy...can you say rock bottom?
He asked me why my bellybutton was so ugly... and wondered why i wasnt in the mood anymore.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
He came into the hospital yelling "HEY EVERYBODY! REMEMBER ME?"
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
We should totally stay in at new years, have sex and try to time orgasm to the countdown
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
Randomize
