Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I just wanna inform you guys that the first pregnancy scare of 2016 is over...
Sex and compliments. The way to my heart
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