I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Latest life lesson : don't accidentally send an "I nutted on her tramp stamp" text to your tattoo-less girlfriend. Oops.
sorry for making everyone realize you look like bruce jenner
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
Peanut butter fills the cracks of my heart
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Burnt my boob on a piece of hot waffle at work today..I feel like thats a new low point in my career..
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Remember when I made fun of you when you ran out of toilet paper on your brother's birthday and had to use coffee filters? Guess what happened today
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
Randomize
