I smell stomach acid.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
You going to have to be more specific than the night we blew an 8ball off the toilet..
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
I am significantly less than sober now. Gonna make like, ten hotdogs.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Randomize
