If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
3pm strippers are depressing
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I'm definitely closer to having sex in every building on campus than I am to having a post-graduation career/plan/future. Unless that future is getting fucked in lots of buildings. I got that shit on lock down.
I've scurried myself in your trunk come find me in the morning
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