We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I NEED TO GET TO THE PLAYGROUND. I JUST NEED TO SWING. IF I SWING MAYBE THE SMELL WILL COME OFF OF ME. I NEED TO SWING
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Some old chick is rubbing my thigh and saying she needs some Memorial Day dick. Her teeth are kind of gross but I'm going for it.
Buying the inflatable beer pong table for the pool was one of the best investments I've ever made
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I think I'm actually too depressed to do drugs, wow.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
I STUDIED GEOGRAPHY I KNOW THIS SHIT!! DON'T YOU DARE QUESTION MY AUTHORITY ON GLACIAL DEPOSITION AGAIN BITCH!!
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