Having a random hookup so left but love u
I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
You didn't see us wave? How could you not? We were all going like 10mph screaming at you. We were stoned and didnt wanna run over pedestrians
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
We were high as balls fucking in the back seat when we saw the blue lights. He's like, "I got this" and walked over butt ass naked and goes, "Sorry dude, we're just banging" and the cop apologized for disturbing us and drove off.
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I was trying to get nudes from last night and ended up getting a family portrait!
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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