I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
He told me I had smoking hot areolas then he wins an executive of the year award. How does that even happen?
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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