that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
He said 'I really struggle with the sin of lust' then we proceeded to have sex. So I guess it was a perfectly executed Catholic pick up line?
Randomize