I wish I only lived at night.
is it bad that i think of my life in terms of the sims? like when i'm hitting it off with someone, i really wish a plus sign would appear above my head. and when i throw up from drinking way too much, a minus sign.
His idea of a romantic evening was shotgunning Keystones. What a keeper.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
I FINALLY HAVE A REASON TO DYE MY PUBES BLUE!!!
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
