Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
Just looked at my call log. I called Planned Parenthood at 3am.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
talked to my RA about stamps and mailmen again. when do you think she'll realize that i only talk to her when i'm high?
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
Y'know, "Class cancelled because Professor is stuck in Mexico," is not something I expected in college. Let alone, "Professor is stuck in Mexico, AGAIN."
I just realized I'm the burger in your burger and steak anology. Very disconcerting.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
