I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
Just found a wrench in the washing machine. Sooo not doing your laundry anymore.
His penis is small and he doesnt like Harry Potter. HE HAS NO REDEEMING QUALITIES WHAT AM I EVEN DOING HERE
She sent pictures and the names of her 2 cats and her dog and told me that I should be happy to have met the whole family.
You must be good in bed dude
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
He told me he wanted to sober fuck the shit outa me... I took that as a compliment
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
I need to wash the frat house off of me
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Randomize
