you're drinking in the law library????
...not a bad idea....
probably not a good idea either.
I just watched a trucker jack off to a picture of Ellen DeGeneres at a truck stop in Nebraska.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
She uses empty wine bottles as book ends. 2 on each side. At least 8 shelves.
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
Right now I can't do anything that will ban me from donating plasma. That is a legit source of income for me.
The druken crowd just broke into singing "God Bless America" while waiting the newlyweds to get in the limo. My friend is eating rose petals.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Yeah to go race car driving with a 54 yr old gastroenterologist. I really wish you'd come to have that drink with me Wednesday
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
Dude, do you think he'd be pissed if he found out that I always reference him as my starter husband?
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
