it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
There are just some things I refuse to put in my mouth.
haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
I'm calling it the Friendlationship with Benefits Zone.
So he says "my girlfriends coming over so you have to leave but I love you"
I just used FaceTime as a look out while I got a blowjob in the library
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
Randomize
