Don't make out with my wife yet
I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I was told to ask you about memoirs of a geisha.
His beard is glorious and he smells like barbecue. Introduce me to him.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
How do you tell someone who's buying a pregnancy test to have a nice day .... Like how
Now I'm heckling that my belch is more exciting than their fireworks and I peed down the driveway.
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Well he wouldn't kiss me so I made out with a German girl, took a shot with my boss, and I think I sprained my ankle. It was a quiet Sunday for me.
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
Randomize
