Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
He is like a dragon that makes me want to spread my butt cheeks, so he can fill me with hot fire.
Awee what are you going to name your new dog?
What dog?
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
Well I typed "penicillin a" into the search engine and before I could finish "penicillin and drinking" popped up. Google knows me too well.
Randomize
