so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
i drank out of a bidet.
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I don't feel bad about fucking old guys. That's what I want. It's what I likeeeeee.
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
