Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
she takes plan B like it's going out of style
I woke up around 30 bottles of beer, with a piece of aluminum foil in my hand, that had "you Win" Wrote in sharpie..
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
He came in my nose, then said it would help clear my sinuses.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
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