Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Chasing bourbon with pepto... Dedication.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Sometimes you have a life bucket list item checked off like 4 tits in your face simultaneously and getting to bang them both. I'm sorry I bailed on skiing but not really. Coming over with a boombox playing 'heat of the moment' as soon as I can hail a cab cause I'm too drunk to drive still...
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
What happened to you last night?
SO. MANY. SHOTS.
Randomize
