I like bacon cheeseburgers and the pussycat dolls
Does that mean you want me to loosen up your buttons at carls jr?
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Oh and in case you were wondering it is not a good idea to eat weed brownies and then go out to the bar. When I got off the bar stool my high had just hit me and I felt like Bambi taking his first steps
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
Can I just say I love the fact that were in business with guys where I can write a hand job up hoes down text message
People will say "JOE YOU MUST TURN DOWN" and I will refuse, in the name of liberty.
His cat watched us the ENTIRE time. Every time I glanced over the poor kitty looked at me as if I were pelvic thrusting her father to death.
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
If I get my period the weekend your parents are gone i'm removing my uterus.
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