peeing in bathroom at penn station and the homeless man next to me is combing his beard with a fork...god I love new york
The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i think the penis that was inside of me changed my life
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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