Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
We need to get her some penis inspired head protection.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
It just smells like spaghetti and despair.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
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