So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
I'm a gentlemen, chivalry is what i do, i'll open the door, pull out your chair, buy your drinks, i'll even go down first, but when it comes to mario kart, i draw the line. I'm sorry but i just can't let you beat me at mario kart
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
No clues in my phone. Only dialed call: my own social security number. And that was before 10:00pm.
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
orgy was averted by karaoke, thank god
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Randomize
