im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Is it physically possible to shit out my own bone marrow? Because if not, then I need to see a doctor immediately.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
Do you want to go soon I'm overthinking life and my butthole again
I just puked into a clean basket of laundry.
Got any extra dick over there? I’m running low
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