Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
explain to me why "crisis hotline lolz" is in my contacts?
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
I took both his daughters virginities. There's no way he won't give me a job
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Randomize
