Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
I'm pretty sure they kept making references about gangbanging me but I was too stoned to catch on, I just sat there and stared at his kitten.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
Leave it to my mom and I to turn the hearing into a drinking game.
Randomize