? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
I spilt beer on the table, and she quickly got a straw and yelled party foul and made me drink it.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Randomize
