She said her name was "party"
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
I dont know whats worse: her telling me she was so drunk i was "almost sexy," the fact that even when theyre shitfaced, im just "almost sexy" to girls, or the fact that i wasnt that offended by it.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
who has that picture of us looking like alcoholics at the zoo?
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
My mom got me high and then dropped me off at a church.
I've abandoned trying to find a logical explanation of your life.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
The Olympian is in my bed
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
