This girl in my class is wearing a sweatshirt that says "LEAD ME NOT INTO TEMPTATION" ahaha I almost just laughed out loud. We could never be friends
nothing says happy new years better than a black eye from shooting yourself with a champagne bottle
If I had KNOWN you and mom were coming to visit, I wouldn't have passed out in the frat. This is why I hate surprises.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
how do you politely tell someone their toddler looks alarmingly similar to the berries and cream guy
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
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