He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
Would it be a dick move to report the suite next-door for a noise violation? They're singing Bad Romance off-key and I'm not sure if I can allow that.
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
Congratulations on your lack of fetus.
On a scale from 1 to the worst weekend of my life, that was an 11. I can see again, though.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
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