just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I'm a male taking pregnancy tests with every girl at the party. i have no regrets
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
I can't believe he just friend zoned me like that.
Dude, you're not even gay.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
I didnt realize until i got your email that what i've been missing in my life is someone to send me dog gifs
I just bought six bottles of the 2 dollar vodka. oh yes there will be blood
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