he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
Girls should come with a carfax report
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
I looked at her and said "I now pronounce you pumpkin tits"
I wasn't expecting a boner of this magnitude
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Yeahhh, apparently my brothers think its ok not to check on me if a creeper is talking to me bc i "like those weirdo types"
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I woke up to him watching me sleep and after I told him it was over he asked if we were still on for Vegas next weekend
Randomize
