There's something fitting about a hot in-car interracial makeout to the tune of 'healing the world.' RIP Mike.
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
I love waking up with his head head between my legs, it makes me feel special
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
I woke up in a sink... Not like curled up on top of it though. I was standing, bent over, face first. IN THE DAMN SINK.
NOLA update. Went to Corey Smith at the house of blues last night. Drank PBR and took lots of shots of Jack. Too drunk, cabbed it to the hotel and fell asleep while having sex. Not my finest moment. Now I'm in court. I can't wait to be your attorney.
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
I love her so much I can forgive her for wearing crocs
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
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