Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
She told me I was only the second guy she slept with. I told her she was only my second Megan.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
KNEE DEEP IN HOES. SEND HELP.
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
I HAD SEX WITH COLBY AND HIS FIVE YEAR PLAN IS TO STEAL A REALLY EXPENSIVE PAINTING AND ASKED ME IF ID BE INTO HELPING HIM AND I WOKE UP IN HIS BED TO A WOMANS TUBE TOP NEXT TO ME
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
I'm sorry, but the bed has won this battle. I got up, changed my shirt, combed my hair, put on some deodorant, and then looked at my bed and got back in
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
