i can't help myself.. i am just so in love with the kitchen manager.
...he was wearing JNCO shorts.. i'm pretty sure i saw the dragon.
He passed out mid-signature
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
He came so hard that he yelled what sounded like a spell from Harry Potter.
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
But he said I was unpatriotic for not having sex with him. What was I suppose to say to that?
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
Randomize
