and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Sorry I bailed on you yesterday. I was propositioned.
And you don't turn down margaritas and oral.
guess who smoked weed with their grandpa tonight. and no it wasn't me.
Randomize
