bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
drunk tastebuds have low standards.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
Hooked up with an Aussie chick last night only an Indonesian chick away from completing my lap around the pacific rim
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
I was ashamed to still be in my green tank this morning, but there's a guy here in full on bright green pants and a green blazer. He looks like the lucky charms guy stretched out at drunker than usual. Now, I fade into the background.
I AM THERE IN SPIRIT, TICKLING YOUR BALLS
Hey ask him if he likes swappy seconds
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
Randomize
