all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
In case you were wondering, transporting lube in a ziploc bag is just as bad of an idea as it sounds.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I put the condom across her upper lip. It was like a mustache of a job well done.
We need to be on the same page regarding the 3some this time. No more "one of us should probably leave" moments.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
YOU ARE TAKING ADVANTAGE OF MY INEBRIATED STATE
YOU ARE DRUNK AND USED AND SPELLED THE WORD "INEBRIATED" CORRECTLY. I AM TAKING ADVANTAGE OF NOTHING.
I CAN'T HELP THAT I'M MULTITALENTED YA FUCKER
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Holy Hangover.. I'm marrying whoever put this water by my bed
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
She just texted me saying "come over and eat me out, my vagina smells like honey glazed ham." I know I shouldn't be, but i'm just so curious.
Randomize
