so i just googled the prescription for aldara i saw on your desk this morning...
Youre at medical school. Im eating raw cookie dough, pickles, and orange juice. Naked. On a monday afternoon. I clearly make better life choices than you.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
A client gave me a bottle of vodka today. And he was hot with a beard. It's like he knows my soul.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
YOU WORK IN THE US CAPITOL! YOU CANNOT HAVE SEX IN THE BATHROOM!!
Dude, you are totally ruining intern season for me...
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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