I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I need a burrito and a hug.
Watching him is like watching a star slowly implode
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Do you realize half our text conversations are you asking me for tit pics and me saying no?
we just smoked for like ten hours and got froyo. not a bad start to the weekend.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
